Christmas Sorrow

Christmas Sorrow

I can’t imagine why

The dark wouldn’t rest

On my windowsill

Children’s cheers

Outside in the distance

A sparkling excitement

Almost contagious

Greens and reds glitter your spirit

Mine is carrying a heart

Heavy with bitter memories

Unspoken words

Regrets dance

Like shiny ornaments

I can’t imagine why you would expect me

To light candles and illuminate our home

Play Christmas songs in front of the crackling fire

You left me

You left me without saying goodbye

You left me alone

To pick up the unwrapped silver

The pieces of broken glass

You left behind

Each flickering light

Woven into the green needles

Of perfectly round bushes

Is one of my tears

Squeezed like blood

From a fresh wound

Painting the white snow

Circling my dying soul

Enveloping me in a blanket of sorrow

Like fragrant hot cider soothing my throat

Shredding my core

One layer at a time.

©Mónica Fernandes, 2011